This is a Party Political Broadcast...

In this time of national crisis we need a strong leader. 

A leader who can unite the country under a banner of common ideals. 

A leader who will not shy away from the challenge at hand but will meet it head on. 

A leader who knows what needs to be done but can do it whilst rocking a killer pair of kitten heels.

I therefore hereby announce the formation of the Power to Parents Party (PPP). My manifesto is as follows:

• Extra funding for the research and development of hangover-free alcohol and fat free chocolate.
• Free babysitters for all on Friday nights.
• Children's bedroom doors will be set on a time-lock at weekends, only opening at 9am.
• Any child waking up at 3am will be deemed to have breached the human rights of the parents and dealt with accordingly.
• All children's extra-curricular activities will be outlawed before 11am at the weekend.
• Detention without trial for all under 18's with the sign off of at least 1 parent.
• An immediate end to school 'dress up' days.
• An immediate end to 'project homework'.
• Children's birthday parties will consist of sausage and pineapple on sticks with a round of musical chairs and pass the parcel. All other forms of birthday celebration (football parties, bouncy castle hire, rock climbing, crafts etc.) will be outlawed.
• At least 1 'duvet day' per month per parent with Mary Poppins on speed-dial.
• The Panini company will be banned from creating any more sticker albums.
• The following programmes will be banned: Numberjacks, Paw Patrol, Topsy and Tim and anything that has been subject to a 'remake' (i.e. Bob the Builder, Danger Mouse, Teletubbies, Postman Pat, The Clangers, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles etc. etc)
• YouTube will be immediately taken down with anyone caught 'vlogging' being subject to detention without trial.
• Wifi codes will be changed weekly and only made available when the bins have been taken out and clothes put back in drawers/cupboards.

As a mum, I feel I am more than qualified to run the country on this mandate and I have it on good authority that dads can be quite useful at times as well. 

Membership of the party is now open and changes/additions to the manifesto will be considered when submitted in triplicate to the PPP committee at least 6 months before the relevant meeting. 

Cheques supporting the campaign can be made payable to the PPP (US dollars only please). I look forward to your support. 

*Thank you very much.......doo, doo, doo, doo. Right. Good*

POWER TO PARENTS!